Welcome 2 my site!

I'm Gemmy & this is my site! I'm learning how 2 code now! :)

before we get into it all, it's probably best we get to know each other first, don't u think? i don't like to rush things, so let's take it slow.

now take a deeeeeeeeeeep breath in.....................

=)

.....❊.......

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...❊...........❊............and out!..=)...

......❝ ❞ ✧ ೃ༄...❊...........

..ohhw yeaa baybee it feels good 2 be alive!..❊..


now, here's some things about me

  • my zodiac sign is a Leo
  • i am in love
  • i cry a lot and i love it!
  • i like learning new facts every day, especially about nature
  • fav colours purple, gold & pink
  • love music, love games, love random internet lore
  • I'm over 800 days clean off xans!
  • love breathwork
  • unclaiming bpd
  • trying to get more confident in myself, my ideas & abilites

now that you've gotten to know me a bit, how do u feel?

✧do u fw me???✧

yes

no

I like to take pics!


on my flip phone!!! :D


and also on film and digicams every now and then

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

.•*•.•*•. more pics i have taken .•*•.•*•.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

✻✩Notes & Updates....✩❊

₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.
18/02 ~ Site update: Changed colours to pink & ORANGE to match the crunchy leaves of the changing seasons! I can't wait for mushroom season!!! :)

₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.

28/2 ~ being alive is a lot of work. I've been stuck in functional freeze for a long time. This is me just rambling on my site that I don't think anyone even looks at lol. It's like my public diary. I'm starting to grow more compassion for myself instead of telling myself I'm lazy or affirming that I'm just depressed. The more I learn about being in freeze, the more I understand. Being stuck takes a lot of work for the body, working hard internally to protect me from a danger that is no longer. It's exhausting. There's cognitive dissonance because I know I'm safe now. I'm exhausted of always being exhausted.
I push through, I do all the lifestyle changes that my body needs, and stay consisten at the deep painful work that my soul needs. It's all a lot of work for little/no results, and that's frustrating. I know that community is what will keep me going. But where is it? Choosing holistic methods of healing is an isolating journey, especially when you've band-aided your whole life through pharmacueticals, other substances & behaviors. And everyone around you seems fine because they're medicated.
I need a vulnerable and true hug from a good friend, or a camping trip in the forest during mushy season. I wanna bury myself in the leaves and fall asleep and dream forever. I miss my friends who have left this earth, I wanna be with them again.
I guess a part of me died when I lost who was a sister to me. There's no speedrunning healing, but I just wanna feel okay again. No one knew her like I did, there's no one to share the weight of this loss with and it feels lonely. The grief is subtly all-consuming, swept under my skin as I try to be the best me I can be in this life that just keeps going and going, and for a future I don't know how much I care about anymore, but try to find hope and reason for the people I love. I love making others happy. I guess that's enough reason to stay.

If you've somehow stumbled upon my page, ILY and thanks for stopping by!!! :)
I plan to update this as frequently as possible, and would love if friends would wanna join in this shift from social media to creating our own spaces.
Hypnotized by the scroll, we stay on the same 3-5 sites that are designed to keep us on as long as possible so they can use us to make money!
Let's take back control of what our minds are being fed & what companies we are feeding our lives to, fuck the algorithm & censorship. Long live indie web!! Plsss let's make the internet fun again!
if u wana make ur own website too, neocities.org is the host for this site and you can learn how to create it the way u want easily by just googling things, even if you've never coded before as there are loads of free themes made by other people that you can use! I will update this later with all the resources and tutorials I used to get started. If I can do it, you definitely can because I'm so bad at computer stuff :3

✻✩ plans and things I wanna do when I have the time & brain power for it...✩❊


  • set a shop page / virtual garage sale
  • make a shrine page for Lisa ♡
  • have a guestbook on my website for visitors to sign